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Third and final response to the stump Skoozie meme, archival edition - Gerard and Myra and Frank for
wildestranger! 343 words.
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Myra is the prettiest teddy bear hamster in all the land, Gerard thinks, staring into Myra’s tiny brown eyes. She’s tawny and soft and twitches her nose at him and stuffs her cheeks full of treats so they puff out ridiculously and. Gerard is in love.
“I’m in love,” Gerard says. Myra sits back on her haunches. Gerard splits a yogurt drop in half and sticks it through the little bars of her cage. She scurries over and shoves it in her mouth. Gerard resists the urge to give her the other half, because he knows that much sugar’ll be bad for her.
“It’s a hamster,” Frank says, coming up behind him and hooking his chin over his shoulder.
Gerard gives him a sideways look and Frank pulls a face.
“She’s cute,” Frank concedes. “She’s—is that a cape?”
Gerard bites his lip and hedges, “Um.”
“Did you—no, no, wait a second—did you seriously make her a cape?” Frank’s eyes are wide, and Gerard thinks he’s on the very, very edge of hysterical laughter.
Gerard, in a very small voice, says, “She’s super.”
Frank laughs so hard Gerard’s kind of worried, like maybe he’ll throw up or something. It’s not that funny. The cape is awesome - he got this really soft material from Mikey. It’d been really easy to make, too, and Gerard decides not to mention the teeny-tiny matching booties. Frank totally wouldn’t appreciate them.
“You don’t appreciate Myra’s special-ness,” Gerard says, affronted on her behalf. She rocks the booties and cape, even though she’s currently trying to gnaw them off. He pokes the tip of his finger into the cage and Myra leaves off the booties in favor of nibbling at it. It pinches a little, but she doesn’t break the skin.
“I’m appreciating your special-ness,” Frank says, still giggling.
Gerard nods. “It’s tough not to.”
Frank throws an arm around his shoulder and turns him towards the door. He says, “I’m hungry,” and, “Seriously, she’s super?” and, “Don’t think I didn’t notice the booties. I’m crazy observant.”