seriously, whatever

[skoosiepants]

We had an insurance adjuster come take a look at our basement today. This is just one more thing we don't want to have to do, but whatever. I guess it's nice that we'll get a new rug out of it. And a new wall.

Um. It's monday, I'm BORED.

Okay, so if Andy and Spencer got into a fight, who would win and why?

Who wants to read an AU where Pete is a school bus driver? And not because it's a job but because he honestly loves it, and he knows all the kids on his route and he always makes sure to wait that extra three minutes in front of St. Michael's because little Sam is always running late, and he let's Zachery chat his ear off in the bench seat right behind him and he occasionally makes them sing songs in round, and his favorite ever are field trips, because he's sometimes allowed to help chaperone inside and stuff. And! Maybe Patrick has a kid! (I like giving him kids) And they just moved onto Pete's route and Patrick's kid is suddenly always talking about Pete and how cool Pete is and about jokes Pete tells - which Patrick doesn't think are age appropriate, even though they aren't really bad - and Patrick is kind of suspicious about Pete and he starts walking his kid down to the stop and making it a point to talk to Pete and Pete instantly loves Patrick and is all over him and they start 'accidentally' bumping into each other at other places and things happen! Maybe!

What if Ryan was actually a robot? Would that story be heartbreaking or hilarious? I can see it going either way. Oh, oh, it's like SMALL WONDER!! Only less suspicious, because seriously, who wouldn't actually know that Vicky was a robot? Seriously? She slept in a closet! She had no inflection in her voice - which, Hi, Ryan!! hi!! - she wore the same CREEPY DOLL LIKE clothes EVERY DAY. Ryan would be more like Data, maybe.

If Brendon and Frank accidentally got into a dance-off, who would win and why?

Comments

[darksylvia.livejournal.com]

I think Spencer would. He seems like he would have really creative dirty tricks up his sleeve. Andy would have experience and he would fight just as dirty, but Spencer would be like...evil when pressed.

OMG OMG, CUTE. BUSDRIVER AU, YES alsfjldfjsa.

Oh, man, I think I lean toward the heartbreaking side of Ryan as a robot just because I love Brendon so much and he'd be like...CRUSHED.

But yeah, Vicky could totally be a robot. Maybe she's one of the fembots that survived Austin Powers and now that that whole killing international men of mystery is over, she had to find a new day gig.

[skoosiepants.livejournal.com]

I, too, think Spencer would win. He's definitely sort of evil *nods*

BUS DRIVER PETE! He loves kids and gives them advice and stuff! Say no to drugs! Be cool, stay in school!

[darksylvia.livejournal.com]

PS: Brendon Vs Frank dance off--I think it would depend on the song. Frank rocks, but I have yet to see him shake his ass like Brendon.

[skoosiepants.livejournal.com]

I am picturing them dancing to Elvis' Bossa Nova Baby. I think it would be a close call with that one, but Brendon would probably win.

[withoutmaps.livejournal.com]

I'm going to go with Andy. I love Spencer and I think he'd fight kind of dirty, using elbows and maybe even pulling hair. But Andy is scrappy and he'd go for the quick knock out, go low and Spencer wouldn't even know what hit him.

Pete would be the best bus driver ever, he'd be totally devoted to his job and those kids would be his kids, you know. And his bus would so be that one that the school officials are kind of ashamed of because the kids are really loud and kind of out of control. Of course, one word from Pete and every single one of them would be in their seat, quiet and perfectly behaved.

Also, I have never seen Frank dance and my life is unfulfilled :(

[skoosiepants.livejournal.com]

Andy, eh? I think Andy has more experience, so you are possibly right. Spencer would be green and, also, used to Ryan, and Ryan would mainly slap-fight.

All the kids would ADORE Pete and hang off him before the bus leaves while he's standing beside it, and even kids that aren't on his route come say hi, and then he can also be a recess aid sometimes, and the kids LOVE those days and share candy with him.

[lovinspike247.livejournal.com]

Heh, I think Andy would. Just because I'm sure he knows secret ninja moves. He's awesome like that.

Pete the busdriver...omgyes! :D

[skoosiepants.livejournal.com]

Another vote for Andy. I don't know, Spencer has hidden evil depths. It's a close call, really. I can see Andy having greater experience, though, being older. He can be like, "Spencer, I can teach you many things," and then he takes him down with a karate chop.

[of-evangeline.livejournal.com]

One of these days, I'm just going to make off with your brain. God. And Brendon would totally pull out the robot mating dance and kick Frank's ass.

[skoosiepants.livejournal.com]

Hee! Brendon and the robot mating dance FTW! Frank wouldn't know what hit him!

[civilbloodshed.livejournal.com]

I don't know who would win in a fight, but I do know an awesomely hilarious story about Andy that I just found out two days ago! I went to a concert but I couldn't get in because it was sold out, only my friend got in with his sister and her friends. And Andy was there. Hitting on my friend's 15-year-old sister. *ponders* Maybe Andy would win in a fight...

Brendon would win! I love how they accidentally got into a dance off, but Brendon would so totally win. I mean, it's not like he hasn't spent his entire life learning the steps in Beauty and the Beast and Mary Poppins, also he has Jon to teach him break dancing skillz.

[skoosiepants.livejournal.com]

Are you kidding me? He hit on a 15 yr old? That's HILARIOUS! Oh, Andy.

Brendon would totally claim it was accidental, even though he put Bossa Nova Baby and just give Frank this look, like BRING IT, and Frank would just be dancing, and then suddenly Brendon is copying his moves, but making them BETTER and Frank is all wtf? and does another move, and then they start echoing each other and escalating difficulty and stuff. I think I've thought about this too much.

[civilbloodshed.livejournal.com]

I'm as serious as that is hilarious! I haven't randomly giggled at odd times this much since I heard Gerard was getting married, to a woman.

And I forgot to say, Robot AU is a Bad Idea. Remember when Frank was a robot? (http://andwristsintact.livejournal.com/2688.html) That was sad. :(

[skoosiepants.livejournal.com]

But! Possibly as comic relief! Like Ryan learning to hug sympathetically and not understanding why Brendon is leaking out his eyes and stuff! Just in the background!

[rain-dances.livejournal.com]

I think Spencer would win. Look at him. He means BUSINESS. :)

Who wants to read an AU where Pete is a school bus driver?

*raises hand* MEEEEEEE.

That is so ridiculously precious. Accidental 'bumping into each other FTW.

I think Ryan as a robot could be, as you said, hilarious or heartbreaking, depending on how one went about it. But god, I can just tell that if it went the hearbreaking route, it would KILL me.

Aaand I think Brendon would win the Dance Off, accidental -haha- or otherwise. Just because...he's Brendon. I don't know.

[skoosiepants.livejournal.com]

I'm thinking Robot Ryan would be like Data, and he tries to learn human emotion, right, but he never quite gets it, and Brendon keeps forgetting that he's a robot and he gets really attached and then Ryan will do something stupid and it hurts Brendon and Ryan's all why, dude? And Brendon is all BECAUSE and Ryan is really trying to understand him, he is, and then maybe he starts to get it, and maybe it makes him sad, and then Brendon is sort of broken because Ryan is a robot and he's in love with him and... I"m going to stop now. Yes.

Brendon would have smoother moves, but Frank would probably hurt himself, and maybe Brendon, too, with like a random flail.

[kws136.livejournal.com]

Oh. My. Can you write the bus driver!Pete one, please? Cause - yeah. That would rock. And totally get me out of my Monday boredom. Andy would win, because of his secret ninja moves (and Spencer wouldn't even see/hear him coming)! And if Ryan were actually a robot ... mm. Could go either way, really. And Brendon would totally win the Dance off. Just cause he's a spazz like that. He'd pull out something ridiculous, and ... it'd be like Zoolander, honestly.

[skoosiepants.livejournal.com]

Andy as a ninja is hilarious to picture, but I still think it'd be pretty close. Spencer is sneaky and evil.

Brendon as Zoolander! hee!

[natacup82.livejournal.com]

I swear I was begging for the Small Wonder AU on Friday...http://natacup82.livejournal.com/74048.html, and then I went on youtube and watched a bit of an ep and wow was it bad.

[skoosiepants.livejournal.com]

*laughs* that's SO WEIRD! Small Wonder was really, really bad. Worse than Family Matters bad. I wonder what happened to that little girl?

[natacup82.livejournal.com]

I'm surprised she's hasnt been off trying to get in any new Terminator movies, I mean she has great experience playing a creepy ass smart mouthed robot. Sometimes I see the stuff I loved as a kid and I seriously wonder if I had any taste at all.

Oh! And I forgot to say, Frank would totally win a danceoff by default since he would go crazy out there and accidentally knock poor Brendan out.

[skoosiepants.livejournal.com]

I forgot to say, Frank would totally win a danceoff by default since he would go crazy out there and accidentally knock poor Brendan out. *laughs* I can definitely see that. Frank would be all, "oops!" in a totally unrepetent way.

[turnyourankle.livejournal.com]

I don't even like kids but I so want to read that AU.

Ryan as a robot...could be both. I think serious would be really interesting to read though.

[skoosiepants.livejournal.com]

I think Ryan as a robot would break Brendon's heart *nods*

[nutty-moo.livejournal.com]

I reckon Spencer would win cause there is soemthing about him that makes me think that he has supressed rage issue. Andy would so totally hold his own but Spencer I reckon would come out on top.

I could so see Pete as a Bus Driver. If i were Patrick it would Pete's huge grin that would make me wary and then fall completely in love with him. No one can resist Wentz's grin.

Ryan is pretty enough to be a robot. I swear normal people don't look that cute. I think it could be both heatbreaking and hilarious depending on what was done with it.

Brendon would so win a dance off. Frank is too cool to even bother to try and beat Brendon.

[skoosiepants.livejournal.com]

Suppressed rage! I didn't even think of that, you're right. He's so in control all the time. He'd whip Andy's ass.

I would totally not be surprised if Ryan were actually a robot in real life.

I don't know about Frank being too cool. I think Frank would flail around and disregard the beat and hurt himself a lot *nods*

[greyandgrey.livejournal.com]

Totally Spencer. Here's why: Obviously it wouldn't be a physical fight. Andy's a pacifist and Spencer doesn't like to get mussed. So clearly it would be a bitch-off. Filled with the silent treatment and cutting comments intentionally whispered to a third party while the other can hear. Andy's not very good at this kind of fighting, so he mostly sticks to the silent treatment until the whole thing frustrates him so much that he finally confronts Spencer and is all "Fine! You win! I'm sorry!" And Spencer just smirks at him and then they get back to normal.

Clearly, Brendon only wishes he had sweet moves like Frank.

If Ryan was actually a Robot I would piss myself laughing.

And now you've introduced me to another hypothetical fic that I didn't know I even wanted but now I need like burning. So thanks for that.

\o/

[skoosiepants.livejournal.com]

*laughs* a bitch-off! I didn't even think of that, and it so fits them and Spencer definitely has it all over Andy in that respect, yes :)

Frank just might kill Brendon showing off his sweet moves. It would certainly be an awesome thing to see!

BUS FIC!!!!!!!!!! Patrick is a concerned father! Pete things kids are AWESOME! They like DINOSOARS, just like him!! Patrick thinks Pete is "special" in the short-bus sense! But Pete is just enthusiastic about everything, and he LOVES Patrick, and he loves that they keep running into each other at the record store, and Pete is - oh my god, Pete is an ASPIRING KID SONG WRITER! He needs Patrick to sing his songs about kittens and crossing the street and the buddy-system and state capitals!!!!!

[greyandgrey.livejournal.com]

OH MY SWEET GIA, I LOVE YOUR BRAIN!

[bibliokat.livejournal.com]

He needs Patrick to sing his songs about kittens and crossing the street and the buddy-system and state capitals!!!!!

PLEASE WRITE IT, PLEEEEEEEEEASE!

[skoosiepants.livejournal.com]

Patrick would be like, dude, these are the wrong capitals! Pete would be like, but they rhyme! Pete knows that rhyming is an important part of kids' songs.

[bibliokat.livejournal.com]

They're both *so smart*!

Ok, now I'm actually thinking about capitals and states, and they are really hard to rhyme!

Juneau, Ohio; Boise, Hawaii; Helena, Nebraska...

[aillychan.livejournal.com]

Ahaha, the random quote at the top of the page for me was:
“Are those—are those dog biscuits?” Patrick asked tentatively, like he was afraid Jon would say yes and then he’d have to punch him for teasing him about honest-to-god food meant for human consumption and not robots like Ryan.
♥♥♥

Ryan as a robot could go both ways, but I think even if it was heartbreaking I'd be secretly snickering the whole time. Creepy Ryan Ross.

Neither would win in an accidental dance-off between Brendon and Frank, because after a few minutes one of them would either break a lamp or hit someone in the face, and the contest would be shut down but quick.

[skoosiepants.livejournal.com]

Creepy Robot Ryan Ross, yes. He would totally be hilarious in the background of a story.

Neither would win in an accidental dance-off between Brendon and Frank, because after a few minutes one of them would either break a lamp or hit someone in the face, and the contest would be shut down but quick. I whole-heartedly agree with this assessment *nods*

[adannu.livejournal.com]

...

You and clumsygyrl, and bandom.

Okay. I'm not in bandom, but I would totally read that bus driver story. *edges far away from yet another fandom*

lalala *grin*

[skoosiepants.livejournal.com]

Bandom is AWESOME FUN for everyone!

The bus driver story is universal in it's awesome glory :)

[neurotica-hello.livejournal.com]

pete would be a dastardly bus driver, or the only one needing the word dastardly in front of his title anyways. the kids would be alternately surprised and scared of him or his driving every day, i guess, if only because he took unconventional routes ("through ms. trudy's convenience store parking lot today or into the junkyard?").

andy and spencer are too dignified to fight, i can't picture andy rolling around on the ground anyways. i get the feeling they'd be more the type to engage in some sort of intense competition...god knows what, it'd have to be something only those two could thik up, but spencer would win because he cheats, no doubt.

ryan is a robot. hands down.

and finally, i think frank would truly win but brendon would destroy the trophy doing something he learned from pants off dance off or dancing with the stars or dance dance revolution, something with the word 'dance' in it. pure enthusiasm knows no bounds. or maybe ryan should come in and school their asses with his rendition of the robot, whilst andy and spencer turn it into a one-on-one match ending up in a rollicking performance of breakdancing from andy and spencer's hip-swiveling salsa.

wow, that's a lot of writing, sorry.

[skoosiepants.livejournal.com]

I can see Andy and Spencer giving each other dirty, narrowed looks, and nobody knows why, only they know, and whenever Brendon brings up Spencer's behavior around Andy, Spencer's like, "He knows why," and there's this whole huge unknown feud and it'd be hilarious.

If Ryan came in with the robot, he would TOTALLY steal the show. Frank and Brendon would just give up.

[keraha.livejournal.com]

These are pretty much the most amazing hypotheticals ever.

Somehow, in my head, Patrick's kid suddenly gets suspicious of Pete after Patrick says possibly one thing too much about him. Because Patrick's kid knows how to raise his father properly, and a bus driver is not Proper Company (even though he takes the fun route to school and is basically awesome. But awesome for kids! Not dads! There are lines!). In the end, though, he comes to terms with it, and all the other kids on the bus are jealous.

Ryan the robot is pretty tragic. In the music making sense, he knows what he wants the music to sound like, but he can't actually produce it himself. So he makes Brendon sing his words for him and it's frustrating and-- oh wait. :(

Lastly, the dance off is too much beauty for me to even imagine. Just imagine how Panic! and MCR would react! (And Ryan the Mandroid emotionlessly doing the Robot in the background.)

Seriously. These scenarioes ftw!

[skoosiepants.livejournal.com]

*laughs* Yes! Patrick's kid gets jealous and wants his dad to himself, and Pete's in the way and everything!

Ryan the robot is sad in everyway when you think of that as the central theme, right? But if it's just a peripheral part of the story, I'm thinking it could be GREAT comedy.

Ryan roboting behind Frank and Brendon is the best mental picture ever.

[keraha.livejournal.com]

I'm thinking it could be GREAT comedy.

XD Agreed. I'm just imagining what would happen if hapless!Data!Ryan tries to understand emotion, and, to help him out, Brendon wrote him a comprehensive instruction manual on cues of body language and personal space. Spencer would write horrified corrections. (Pete, William and Gabe would go through great efforts to obtain said manual, but everyone knows that that is a Bad Idea and prevents this from happening). Enter Jon from stage left with his hugs. Ryan tries to interpret, but gets conflicting messages from Instruction Manual v1.Brendon and Manual 2.Spencer. Hijinks! Confusion! Ryan!

In short: Oh Ryan. There's something inherently tragic and hilarious about the boy.

[skoosiepants.livejournal.com]

Okay, but wait. Wait. Okay, can you picture that entire scenario you just mapped out with the manuals and everything only where Ryan is NOT ACTUALLY A ROBOT. I'm just amazed by how hilarious that would be, oh my god. The MANUALS! Only maybe with Brendon and Jon writing them, because Spencer might have to be on Ryan's side when Ryan starts getting pissy about them.

[keraha.livejournal.com]

*DIES* Okay. Yes. Spencer is definitely necessary as the much needed voice of reason (according to Ryan). Although that means Jon and Brendon are in charge of the manual. THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS PERSONAL SPACE.

Would this be part of the school!AU? Because the image of Bob finding the manual in the recycling bin (because Ryan is teaching his students the 3Rs) and reading it is too beautiful. You'd see his eyes skim the first few lines, then aha! It explains everything! Ryan is a robot! (Bonus points if he reads indicators of affection like, "Creepy staring =/= flirting!" and puzzles over Ryan's behavior. Is he flirting with all of the children? Is that even possible? Surely he wouldn't have been hired. Besides, Ryan stares at everyone creepily. Even him. :O !! )

[skoosiepants.livejournal.com]

Hee! It could be! Brendon and Jon keep slipping notebook papers into his school stuff that say things like SMILING LETS THE OTHER PERSON KNOW YOU ARE HAPPY and YOUR EYES MAY LEAK OCASSIONALLY, THIS IS PERFECTLY NORMAL and Ryan gets so angry and tosses them out and Bob READS THEM!